Time stands still on some days, most Days. There is no such thing

time? It is a blur, a fog in my mind

 to I am taken by moments of inertia

The absence of sound, movement, empathy that I feel sinks me further

Time doesn’t exist there. 

Exhibition Idea

Thinking about what and how I would like to exhibit..

I think I definitely want to present a video – I believe the immediacy and idea of the viewer staying to finish it and waiting for me to end what I have to say is quite endearing. I like the idea of having it quite long-winded so that the viewer is bored but wants to see where it is going… I think I remember Davida talking about this in an artists piece and I really liked the concept behind it and the effect it has. It was an artist I think that I was researching, multiple occupancy??

It reminds me of the concept behind the steps at a museum; the steps leading up to the entrance change their height and distance compared to normal steps so that you are consciously aware of the change and that you think about the fact you are about to enter this museum, so focus… for me this relates to the idea that you’re now witnessing my emotive state so step out of your fast paced, busy lives and just feel for a minute.

Anyway, I would like to show my video large so that it can engulf the viewer.. I want them to be transferred into the shadows, movements and slight noises that are happening and not take in other things around them. I want this video to be the centre of attention. Equally, however, I have taken some stills from the videos and I would like to stretch them and mount them to exhibit. I’d also like to have poetry to go alongside. So many things I’d like. I had a dream about having a video and then a vitrine in between the video and the viewer. I think I may have had a poem in it. But I think speaking would be more effective and relevant- because speaking is my issue. NOT SURE.

I’ve been reading a little about poetry in art and I liked the idea of having missing words because of my stutter I thought it might be interesting to try that but I’m struggling at the moment to focus my mind on what I’m feeling in order to write anything, because right now I’d just rather not feel.


Recent Idea

Thinking about how my anxiety affects my life in everyday situations, the thing that comes to mind is my inability to attend certain things whether it be something important, family occasion, friends meeting up, classes, something I need to do etc.. Sometimes I just cannot make it. I often can’t explain my non attendance and it turns into another one of those unfortunate cycles. From this initial point I thought of this idea of absence and how I can express my absence.

Having photographs of places, and people with just a photograph of me near them or being held. This will emphasise the fact I am not there but also play on the idea that it is staged. I feel that a lot of my mental thought process around the social anxiety is made worse by my own perceptions- therefore I feel like I am often creating these scenarios in my head that aren’t actually necessary.

I will be taking the photograph, I will have posed for the photo in that is present and I will be directing what the photograph is of.. but crucially I am not in the scene in person.

Need to consider the type of photograph of myself; where I want it, whats in the background, what I am doing, what i am showing, size. material (needs to be stable if I’d want it to stand alone)



Painting means time, thought, there’s a loss of expression for¬†me¬†during the process because it becomes about the painting and not the initial idea.

A photo, text, film is immediate. It’s a snapshot of my expression, whether staged or not.
Theres no time for me to self doubt, to avoid or to lose motivation with something that is immediate
Research the meaning of snapshot.