These videos highlight the moment that anxiety hits.
I filmed the videos through glass that has slight smudges on- this acts as a metaphor for the barrier between myself and the people I am perceived by. The smudges are important because it emphasises the fact there is something in between the camera and myself and shows that there it is not clear.
At the start for a short period of time the film is at normal speed but then transitions into slow motion- I wanted to make a clear distinction of the overwhelming effects of when anxiety starts. Often it is a result of social interaction, or even just the possibility of social interactions taking place. The slow motion marks the point where my mind is taken over by overthinking and physical symptoms.
I start the video at a position that shows my body, face and some background- it ends with my face very close to the camera. This explores the idea that anxiety is all in my head, and when it is present all I can think about is how I am reacting to it, how I am perceiving things, and I am reflecting my own thoughts onto other people. It’s bordering on narcissism, the frame is just my face.
Eye-contact with the camera is another aspect of exploring the anxiety in an emotive way. The amount of direct eye-contact with the camera changes to give the feel of avoiding the camera but then equally being aware of being watched. I want the viewer to feel uncomfortable for watching me.
quote about how text changes how you view a photograph/art
I’m intrigued about Calle’s life and her work. I stumbled across her book in the library and decided to pick it up because of its name M’as- tu vu? which translates as Did you see me? This title was important to me because I have a fondness for the french language (I used to use French to say things that I felt unable or embarrassed to admit, I’d write my secrets in French. It was almost like a coding, and a more romantic way to say what I felt.); but it was also important because it made me think about philosophical meanings to seeing a person.
The book did not disappoint. Sophie’s work is not art work that has been created as such, it is a documentation of her life but also it’s living her life for her art. She uses photography, writing and installations to display her work. Calle’s work is very autobiographical which is what I am attracted to in art, and what I like to present also.
- Calle’s photography paired with a paragraph of her account on the work
- Her boyfriend dumping her
- Hiring a private detective
i really like the way she writes about her work, and chooses an image that has a much deeper meaning to her life but it’s not obvious to the viewer until you read her text.
This door is all I have to keep me safe from your gaze.
This wall is holding me still away from the world’s maze.
This window is how I leave without having to be seen.
This floor keeps me grounded when I’m stuck in between.